Spur of the moment
Wow! It has been a long time since I visited this blog. Like a year maybe? or just months.
I have got a lot of stuffs going on through my mind. For those of you who might not know, I came back to Iligan to study Masters in Business Management. Geez. I couldn’t even express the emotions, the memories, the drama I went through this year and the year hasn’t even end yet.
How I wish the Pensieve was real. I would certainly love to own one and just put all my memories in it and view it whenever I feel like it.
As I was walk my way back to my boarding house, the lyrics of a song came up to mind, “what’s life to offer me, when I grow old”. True enough what will life offer me? What will I do with my life now? I got a bit sentimental.
Like the song Who Am I, I am a flower quickly fading here today and gone tomorrow. A wave tossed in the ocean, a vapor in the wind. Life goes on as they say, things change and the question is what will I be doing for the rest of my life?
Will I stay in Iligan, go back to Gensan, pursue Cebu/Manila or go overseas? A lot of choices that offer opportunities are waiting but this won’t really mean anything if you still don’t know what you want. I guess I am still sort of loss. What do I want? What is my purpose here, in a sense what will I do for a living?
I guess this just comes up to you, you make plans, want to do this and that and yes you do it but does it really fulfill you as a person? Yes we go out with friends, with family, have a good time, sometimes not, get in love and get heart broken, feel like your whole has fallen apart, pick yourself up again, start a new life. Its like a cycle or a pattern and every human being has his or her own experiences. Life is life. So big and complex yet can be simple and so beautiful.
After graduating last year, I went back home to Gensan. I wasn’t really sure what I will be doing, where I will be working. But I end up working at the KCC Mall. It was alright. Good pay. Few minutes ride away from home. I resigned a year after being just recently getting regular. I don’t know what I was thinking but it felt that I don’t want to be in that position anymore. So I decided to go back to Iligan and get my Masters, teach at the college just to have an income, and continue to work on my Network Marketing. That was basically the plan. I never did intend to teach, I just took the job so that I can have a living. What I am into now is Network Marketing. The possibilities here are limitless. It’s like I have the leverage now, I know something that not everyone else easily understands. They say it’s a scam but I say otherwise.
People seldom talk about their family because they don’t want to share about it. But I want to mention them here as part of a recollection. My parents are almost going to retire in their professional fields, being a CPA and a PEE, they have done their share of working. What I really would love to share is that my Dad has opened himself to Church now. He is a Catholic and we are Christians, and for so long we’ve been praying for him to join us at Bread of Life Ministries, and thank God now he is. There is still that old stubborn self of him but at least now he participates in meetings and cell groups. My eldest sister just passed the Medicine Board Exam (hurray!), and my other sister is now in Singapore. A lot of things has changed this year and again the year hasn’t ended yet. I have always been thankful for my family. They are not perfect but I love them.
I have always loved basketball. As much as possible I play the game with friends. It’s like the only thing that I know that I’m good at. It has been part of my dream to play for the country, sad to say there are a lot of dream snatchers in your life. Either that or they don’t really support Women’s Basketball that much in this country. Or any sports for that matter. Besides sports, blogging and tweeting are some of the usual things I do. I love reading books too that range from horror to inspirational, leadership, self improvement and motivation and etc. And right now I have additional books in my list, those about network marketing and business. I also love listening to music and watching movies.
I never did care about this topic before. I always shrugged myself when asked about this one. But now that I have experienced it, I can say that it is one of the best things in life. Love is amazing indeed and yet scary and dangerous. It is amazing because of the feeling it gives you that you just can’t explain not to mention the thought that someone loves you back, it’s like you can say life is good. Of course I’m talking about that relationship, not the love for friends, family, and pets. On the other hand, it is dangerous cause it can really tore a person into pieces if not handle well. I’ve learned that dealing with people and emotions is really hard. And in a relationship it really is commitment to each other that makes it last. And long distance relationships can work to, it just needs a little extra effort, honesty, and commitment. And of course you put God in the center of the relationship.
I’ve had my share of love and lost. And I can go on writing about it but not in this entry. All I can say is that I wish it didn’t ended so soon. But the show must go on as they say it and so does my life. I hope for that day when I can love again, freely, no chains and be myself. And I pray that it will last long enough before you can say “I am not happy with you anymore”.
So yeah, thanks for reading. I hope I made sense? This entry was just to let the stuffs in my head go out. What I had written is just the Ihalf of what I want to say but i can’t really write it all, can I?
The year is not yet over. A lot of things can still happen. Good things, I hope. Good things.